IN THE DUMPS SWIMMINGLY

The Park Avenue elite no longer swim in luxurious pools or at restricted beaches lately. They’ve apparently grown tired of these aquatic locales and now do their swimming in the dumps…or in dumpsters, to be more precise.

NYC’s latest brainstorm (an F5 tornado, insofar as absurdity’s concerned) was to convert several garbage dumpsters into swimming pools and place them at 40th and 41st Streets on Park Avenue. For the next three Saturdays the 8’x22’, 3 ½’–4 ½’ deep, Dumpster pools will be part of the Summer Streets program. Each Dumpster could accommodate up to 10 swimmers at a time and will be open from 7a.m. to 1p.m.

“I wanted to do it on Park Avenue because it’s the ultimate contradiction. It will be wild to see people swimming on Park Avenue, near Grand Central, in bathing suits—shocking,” according to Dumpster designer/ mastermind David Belt.

The wilder/ crazier me tends to agree with Belt’s “ultimate contradiction” theorem; nevertheless, my more rational nature requires time for stories like this to sink in (especially before posting)…in the event that I may be hallucinating.

New York Post

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